Blonde Jokes
Three female convicts -- a brunette, a redhead and a blonde -- escaped from a maximum security prison one night. They dashed through the woods toward freedom, but the barking dogs of the prison guards steadily grew closer. Finally, one of the convicts said to the others, "Quick, we've got to hide in the tree branches." So each climbed up a different tree.

The dogs and the guards holding them approached the base of the tree where the brunette was hiding. The brunette, in the top of the tree, thought quickly, opened her mouth and went, "Whoo! Whoo!" One guard said, "It's just an owl; let's move on."

The dogs led the guards to the tree where the redhead was hiding 20 feet up. The redhead went, "Caw! Caw!" The guard said, "It's just a crow; let's move on."

The dogs led the guards to the tree where the blonde was hiding up in the branches. The blonde thought for a moment, and then went, "Mooo!"


There's a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead traveling through the desert when their car suddenly stalls. They all get out of the car and, upon realizing that it's not going to start, they each take one thing from the car. The brunette takes a bottle of water, the redhead takes a bag of food with her, and the blonde takes the car door.

They begin to walk through the desert, and soon stop to rest. At this point the blonde and the brunette turn to the redhead and ask her why she brought the food. She replies, "Well, in case I get hungry I'll have something to eat."

They all think this is pretty reasonable and then the redhead and the blonde turn to the brunette and ask her why she decided to bring water. The brunette replies, "Well, in case I got thirsty I'll have something to drink." They all decide that's a good idea, too.

Finally, the brunette and the redhead turn to the blonde and ask her why on earth she would take the car door. She replies, "Well, I thought if I got hot I could roll down the window


A blonde calls her boyfriend on the phone with a problem.
What's the matter?" he asks.
"Well, I've bought this jigsaw puzzle, but it's too hard. None of the pieces fit together and I can't find any edges."
"What's the picture of?" he asks.
"It's a big rooster," she replies.
"All right," he says, "I'll come over and have a look."
When he arrives, she thanks him for coming over and leads him over to the kitchen table where she has it laid out.
He looks at the jigsaw and says, "For God's sake - put the cornflakes back in the box."